Weekly Watches

Vacation has been a whirlwind of a good time. I ran a half marathon, hiked 12 miles, biked 41 miles, did a couple more sunset beach runs, watched all eight new episodes of Bojack Horseman, tried some great brunch, hung out on the beach, and, most importantly for this blog, WATCHED MOVIES. Normally I call these posts “This Week in Movies” but instead I think I’m going to start titling it “Weekly Watches” because it is more clear that it is a post about movies that I watched and not just a ton of movies that were released this week. Now, I want to warn you, I hated a lot of these movies. I am not just “in a bad mood” either, I think that a few were boring or okay, a couple were bad, and one was just straight-up trash. We’ll get into that a little more below but I bring this up to say that just because I hated them or yawned a lot doesn’t mean you will! We all have different tastes and I like to try all flavors of movies; I like to do that anyway but there is an added benefit that I can recap them here and maybe give everyone a preview into something they may love. (Except the half star movie…….no one should watch that.)

  • Dolemite Is My Name (2019): Okay so we’re actually starting off with one that I liked! This is Eddie Murphy’s return to the screen, and his first rated R movie since 1999. Also returning to the screen is Wesley Snipes, who is marvelously cocky in this movie. The film is detailing the events of how Rudy Ray More created his iconic character Dolemite and then turned his stand up act into a movie; it (the original) was the indiest of indie, the most DIY, as he used mostly his friends and their connections to make it. I don’t know if any of you have ever seen the 1970s Dolemite, but unless you’re my mother, go watch it! This movie is basically Murphy’s version of The Disaster Artist, and I personally think it is a much better movie. It is uplifting in a weird, vulgar way. Moore wanted nothing more than to have multiple spinning plates and everyone doubted him and he did it anyway. It’s a great movie, and it’s on Netflix, so go check it out.

  • Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994): One thing that this movie makes abundantly clear is that British weddings are boring and everyone is just going through the motions. My feelings toward it were very similar to that message: this is boring but I’ll just keep going with it. The film features Hugh Grant as an English guy who can’t commit and Andie MacDowell as the American girl who changes him. Over the course of several weddings and a funeral, they have a back-and-forth availability dance, and Grant has to come to terms with his previous behavior. From the point of a young woman in 2019, most of the aforementioned behavior doesn’t really seem as horrid or misogynistic as the movie makes it out to be. For me, that actually weakens the story, because it relies on the viewer having a strong reaction to Grant’s transformation. There’s nothing edgy or interesting about this film but after a long day at work where all you want is a dryly funny rom-com from Netflix, it should definitely do the trick.

  • Jackie Brown (1997): Back to the ones I LOVE! Jackie Brown is a rewatch for me. I am something of a Tarantino skeptic—I love Reservoir Dogs and the Kill Bill movies, and I was mostly impressed with Once Upon A Time In Hollywood (Brad Pitt just up there doing his thing, oozing cool) but all the rest of his movies I’m either lukewarm on or don’t really like. This is the big exception. I think it is Tarantino’s best work by FAR and that his talent as an edgier but conscious filmmaker is on full display here. The story is about an airline stewardess (named Jackie Brown) who is sneaking cash into LA from Mexico for her boss. When she gets caught she devises a plan to screw over both her boss and the cops. It’s a great example of a well written and well-paced narrative. Everything folds out with actions that make sense and connect the dots while also not giving anything away. The cause and effect chain here is impeccable. Robert DeNiro, Bridget Fonda, and Michael Keaton all give standout supporting performances and Samuel L Jackson, Pam Grier, and Robert Forester are fantastic as the leads. It’s a timeless crime classic and (at least for now) on Netflix. (Also I partly watched it because I’m visiting my dad in the South Bay right now, where most of the movie takes place, and I gotta say if Jackson is paying for Fonda’s Hermosa condo ON THE STRAND, then, yeah, I can see why he was so desperate to get all that money.)

  • Manglehorn (2014): This was one that I was extremely hopeful for and really let me down. Another on my “watch every Al Pacino movie” list, it is a story of a locksmith with a regrettable past and forgettable present. Basically the movie takes you through the mind of Manglehorn, living day to day, and honestly, it is kind of just, well, boring. Now, there is conflict, as he doesn’t have a good relationship with his family and he is extremely self-loathing, but those conflicts don’t drive a story. Pacino is putting in real work with this movie and digging deep into his character, but he is really the only one doing that level of effort and the results are unbalanced and bland. If character studies are your thing and you love Pacino as much as me then catch up with it for sure, otherwise use caution. (Also on Netflix.)

  • Righteous Kill (2008): This is where we wade into “I hated it” territory. This is the movie that reunited Pacino and DeNiro (another Pacino movie to cross off my list, on Netflix, and DeNiro as a bonus) and it’s a CRIME THRILLER! They’re two cops hunting down a serial killer who is killing off shit head criminals who get around the system. And there’s a big twist at the end! It should be good right? Nope. I’m not saying don’t watch it because you may disagree, but I found that none of it made sense. Unlike Jackie Brown, the twists come out of nowhere, all the motives are unclear and nonexistent, there is no cause and effect, the non-linear structure doesn’t lead to a conclusion with a mind-blowing OH THAT’S WHY THEY DID THAT moment, and the visuals are seriously lacking in style. There’s a high shock value ending but it isn’t earned, even with the two leads doing all they can to make this movie work. I hated this movie and that makes me sad. Honestly, it just seems like a butchered opportunity.

  • Polar (2019): This one. This is the half-star piece of shit disaster of a movie that NO ONE should ever watch. Ever. There is a tonal inconsistency that is so offensive to any film fan that I am surprised it was in any way greenlit and that anyone thought during the making of this movie it would work. The first scene shows a group of hitmen setting up Johnny Knoxville’s character (a retired colleague) with a blowjob to then murder him while they laugh about about it. The movie itself is about a man who wants to retire (Mads Mikkelsen, sadly) but knows he’ll be hunted down and murdered so he and younger assassins kill the killers. Part dark humor, part serious thriller, part gaudy comedy this movie can’t balance tone for shit. (And there are ways to make all three work in one movie, Tarantino has done it, and so have the Coen Brothers.) Not to mention there is a deep misogynistic way that it goes about showing the female characters that is beyond questionable Hollywood conventions (again, looking at you Tarantino) that we all can go ahead and stomach. This is Suckerpunch levels of gross and honestly I’m just so over directors and screenwriters not even trying. Don’t watch this one, not even drunk.

  • The Company Men (2010): This is the last movie I have watched this week, and honestly it wasn’t good or bad, it just was. It’s about a man fired from his suit and tie job who has to work in construction and a scattered cast navigating through those events that are interconnected. The cast is good: Ben Affleck, Tommy Lee Jones, Chris Cooper, and the premise is really interesting. But to me, it all just felt so…blah. It should have been engaging but something never really quite gripped me about it.

So that’s it for this week! I know it seems like kind of a dud week but there were a couple of great ones in there, one of which is a new release, and all of them are accessible and on Netflix. I’ll be watching some movies on the plane rides home that I think are going to be really good, and next week our podcast has three movies: Event Horizon, Cape Fear (the Scorses one), and Mad Max: Fury Road. The topic is tied to Rick and Morty, as these are all referenced in it, and then a larger discussion on pop culture references in adult cartoons. It will be fun and exciting, but the weekly watches will be low, due to an extra movie for the podcast. For now, though, it’s my last day in California and I have to get ready to hit the beach!